You Don’t Need a Map. You Just Need the Next Move.
Change is here.
Not the theoretical kind of change I talk about as a life coach. Not the kind I try to help others work through.
My change. Right now. In real time.
I’m selling my condo, and I close in a month or so. Yup…it’s under contract.
That one sentence sounds simple but it’s loaded.
Anyone who has ever moved knows how many decisions are hiding inside of it – especially packing, storing, selling, and finding a new home.
What do I pack? What do I keep? What do I give away? What goes into storage? What gets shipped? What have I been holding onto that I don’t even need anymore?
And then there’s the bigger question:
Where am I going?
Do I buy another home immediately? Do I rent? Where do I want to live? What does my next home need to look and feel like at this stage of my life?
And while I’m figuring all of that out, my temporary address may be my daughter’s sofa.
Oh—and life didn’t clear my calendar just because I decided to sell my condo.
I have a birthday trip in October followed by a holiday family cruise.
So somewhere between packing boxes, closing on a condo, sleeping on a sofa, traveling, researching communities, looking at houses and figuring out what I actually want next, I’m supposed to remain sane 😳
That’s when the life coach in me had to start coaching ME.
I Don’t Have to Figure Out Everything Today
Change can create anxiety because our minds want to race ahead.
Where will I be the next three-four months?
Where will I live permanently?
Should I buy?
Should I rent?
What if I choose the wrong place?
What if the house I want isn’t available? It happens.
STOP.
Most of those questions don’t require answers today.
What does require my attention today?
Packing the next box.
Making the next phone call.
Sorting the next closet.
Handling the next piece of paperwork.
Making the decision that’s actually in front of me—not the fifteen decisions that might come later.
I’ve decided to call this strategy:
NEXT, NOT EVERYTHING.
I can have a plan without knowing every detail.
I can have a strategy without controlling every outcome.
I can prepare for tomorrow without living there.
And I can allow some things to unfold.
That’s a big one for me.
Because sometimes our anxiety isn’t really about change.
It’s about wanting certainty.
We want to know how everything is going to turn out before we’re willing to take the next step.
Life doesn’t work that way.
New information comes.
Circumstances change.
Plans shift.
People surprise us.
Doors close.
Other doors open that we didn’t even know existed.
So I’m learning to leave some room in my plan for life to happen.
The Sofa Is a Bridge
I’ve also changed the way I’m thinking about temporary living.
My daughter’s sofa isn’t my destination.
It’s a bridge.
I don’t have to make a major financial decision simply because I need somewhere permanent to put my belongings.
Temporary does not mean unsuccessful.
Temporary means I’m giving myself time.
Time to think.
Time to look.
Time to decide what I really want.
Time to make my next decision from clarity instead of anxiety.
And if a little temporary inconvenience keeps me from making a rushed, expensive, long-term decision?
I’ll take the sofa. I’ll stay out of town a few weekends. I’ll find a quiet hotel for a night or two. Call it self-care 💝
I’m Still Going to Live
I’m also refusing to treat everything enjoyable as an interruption.
My 65th birthday is still happening.
The family cruise is still happening.
I’m going to laugh. Celebrate. Travel. Rest. Eat good food. Spend time with people I love.
Because change doesn’t require me to put my entire life on hold until everything is settled.
This is my life, too.
The messy middle counts.
The transition counts.
The sofa counts.
The vacation counts.
The boxes count.
The uncertainty counts.
And maybe there will even be some beautiful surprises in the middle of all of it.
My Coaching Question for the Next Two Weeks
Every morning, I’m going to ask myself:
What actually needs my attention TODAY?
Not November.
Not December.
Not my forever home.
Today.
What can I control today?
What decision needs to be made today?
What can I accomplish today?
And—equally important—
What can wait?
That’s where I am in this journey.
I don’t know exactly where I’m going to end up yet.
And surprisingly, I’m becoming okay with that.
Because I’m learning something that I hope you’ll remember during your own season of change:
You don’t need the whole map.
You just need the next move.
I’ll tell you what happens next.
—Tena ❤️
Next Move Series • Part Two: Oh Suga Honey Iced Tea – The Map Just Changed
If this blog made you think, taught you something new, or inspired you to dig a little deeper, I’d love your support. Please like ❤️, leave a comment 🗣️, and subscribe/follow so we can continue exploring the stories history too often leaves behind.
You can find me on Facebook, Instagram, Substack, and yes… I’m even having fun experimenting with TikTok, sharing my thoughts, travels, coaching, and what life in my 60s really looks like—one story at a time.
A Note About AI: This blog may have been created with the assistance of multiple AI platforms for historical research, fact-checking, writing support, and image generation. Every idea, perspective, and final edit reflects my voice and my commitment to sharing thoughtful, well-researched stories.
– Tena
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